vacation/traffic
spreading news.
chasing apples.
doing the rockaway.
posted by gijyun |
2.24.2005
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11:05 AM
signs of familial progress
my brother the golden boy, from whom we hadn't heard in over a week.
Heck Yes: suck my white ass, ball.
gijyun: oh good, you're not dead.
Heck Yes: anne, the library is kinda dull right now, and i have to leave for work here in like, a few-ish. but in all of that worry, i'm still listening to the shins.
gijyun: why are you at the library?
Heck Yes: email, mother fucker.
gijyun: what about your new computer at home?
Heck Yes: what about my roommates not paying me for cable/internet?
gijyun: tell them to get the fuck on up outta there.
Heck Yes: k...hold on.
gijyun:is your bank account fixed yet?
Heck Yes: i didn't break it. did you?
gijyun: no, did you?
Heck Yes: enough so people can stop giving me shit for it.
gijyun: get a job, biotch.
Heck Yes: anne...have fun in the sun, get laid in the shade.
gijyun: how are you allowed to chat at the library?
Heck Yes: i do what i want.
gijyun: alex, give me a present. one that doesn't include kicking and screaming.
Heck Yes: no. anne, i told my manager to shut the fuck up yesterday...it was a good one.
gijyun: hmm. did you tell him to let you wait tables?
Heck Yes: yup. or else.
gijyun: or else what.
Heck Yes: or else i'd pretty much do this.
Heck Yes has just signed off.
Heck Yes: suck my white ass, ball.
gijyun: oh good, you're not dead.
Heck Yes: anne, the library is kinda dull right now, and i have to leave for work here in like, a few-ish. but in all of that worry, i'm still listening to the shins.
gijyun: why are you at the library?
Heck Yes: email, mother fucker.
gijyun: what about your new computer at home?
Heck Yes: what about my roommates not paying me for cable/internet?
gijyun: tell them to get the fuck on up outta there.
Heck Yes: k...hold on.
gijyun:is your bank account fixed yet?
Heck Yes: i didn't break it. did you?
gijyun: no, did you?
Heck Yes: enough so people can stop giving me shit for it.
gijyun: get a job, biotch.
Heck Yes: anne...have fun in the sun, get laid in the shade.
gijyun: how are you allowed to chat at the library?
Heck Yes: i do what i want.
gijyun: alex, give me a present. one that doesn't include kicking and screaming.
Heck Yes: no. anne, i told my manager to shut the fuck up yesterday...it was a good one.
gijyun: hmm. did you tell him to let you wait tables?
Heck Yes: yup. or else.
gijyun: or else what.
Heck Yes: or else i'd pretty much do this.
Heck Yes has just signed off.
posted by gijyun |
2.23.2005
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10:31 AM
best. bandname. ever.
all of us are winners.
now that all this basketball nonsense is done and over, it's time to announce the winner of the best fake celebrity sighting that ended up in the newspaper award.
ladies and germs, this one goes out to my bestest friend page, who, after being taunted and teased with rumors from her manager on friday that madonna would be dining at zengo (page's place of business) decided to get even when madonna didn't show. actually, i don't even think she was in town.
so
not being one to take such a prank lying down, page had her friend call zengo's manager in the middle of their saturday night rush and pretend to be steve holden, manager of popular recording artist ashanti, who would be at zengo in less than fifteen minutes (the concierge had highly recommended it), and could they please use a back entrance, and would it be possible to be seated away from any large crowds, and could they kindly alert the staff not to bother ashanti for autographs.
meanwhile
the managers are naturally rushing about getting ready for a superstar who's never going to show, and the word gets out - either by a patron, server, or employee. the world may never know.
someone text messages penny parker, and the next thing we know it's printed in the rocky mountain news that ashanti and entourage were spotted dining at zengo.
yippety fucking doo dah.
oh yeah - page was also so in the hole with our decision to give up curse words for lent that i let her give me twenty bucks to call it even, so we took her dirty money and bought beer.
ladies and germs, this one goes out to my bestest friend page, who, after being taunted and teased with rumors from her manager on friday that madonna would be dining at zengo (page's place of business) decided to get even when madonna didn't show. actually, i don't even think she was in town.so
not being one to take such a prank lying down, page had her friend call zengo's manager in the middle of their saturday night rush and pretend to be steve holden, manager of popular recording artist ashanti, who would be at zengo in less than fifteen minutes (the concierge had highly recommended it), and could they please use a back entrance, and would it be possible to be seated away from any large crowds, and could they kindly alert the staff not to bother ashanti for autographs.
meanwhile
the managers are naturally rushing about getting ready for a superstar who's never going to show, and the word gets out - either by a patron, server, or employee. the world may never know.
someone text messages penny parker, and the next thing we know it's printed in the rocky mountain news that ashanti and entourage were spotted dining at zengo.
yippety fucking doo dah.oh yeah - page was also so in the hole with our decision to give up curse words for lent that i let her give me twenty bucks to call it even, so we took her dirty money and bought beer.
posted by gijyun |
2.22.2005
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8:43 AM
figures.
so, i'm off to new york city wednesday night.
i'm getting pretty thrilled, too; it'll be good to get out of this town for a stint, i think.
the weekend was spent not saving money for my trip.
i've read ikeepadiary.com for a long time. i found out about misShapes through his site, and it matched my recent obsession with lipgloss so i'd been curious to see if we could go.
this morning, i read this.
it reminded me of a mixtape page made last year called 'enuff with the duff.'
i also saw the page where paris hilton's sidekick messages were published; fyi: pauly shore's number is disconnected, and for all i know, that might be lindsay lohann's number at the top.
yes, i tried them both.
i'm getting pretty thrilled, too; it'll be good to get out of this town for a stint, i think.
the weekend was spent not saving money for my trip.
i've read ikeepadiary.com for a long time. i found out about misShapes through his site, and it matched my recent obsession with lipgloss so i'd been curious to see if we could go.
this morning, i read this.
it reminded me of a mixtape page made last year called 'enuff with the duff.'
i also saw the page where paris hilton's sidekick messages were published; fyi: pauly shore's number is disconnected, and for all i know, that might be lindsay lohann's number at the top.
yes, i tried them both.
posted by gijyun |
2.21.2005
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9:08 AM
there he goes. one of god's own prototypes.
dang.
friday potpourri!
dang - i have a pretty busy work day, so here's a quick list of words i use to sound smart, but i really can't say i'm positive i know what they mean or understand their etymology*:
stoic
anachronism
ephemeral
percipient
complacent
dubious
*at least i know what etymology is.
stoic
anachronism
ephemeral
percipient
complacent
dubious
*at least i know what etymology is.
posted by gijyun |
2.18.2005
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9:27 AM
my sister is cooler than your sister.
and, subsequently, my water bottle is cooler than your water bottle.
posted by gijyun |
2.17.2005
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11:20 AM
hey! been tryin' to meetchoo.
in preparation for my trip to new york city next week, i thought it'd be good to figure out the settings on my new camera. the resulting photos left one decently exposed shot of page looking perfectly pissed off.i should really just keep my mouth shut when my girlfriends ask for relationship advice, because my answer to everything is "kick his ass to the curb." even if it's not their fault; i just like saying that.
in an interesting coincidence, i asked decisive what song he was listening to this morning, because i was having trouble coming up with a title for this retarded post. i had the pixies' "hey" going through my head, because that always makes for a good title, and, interestingly, decisive said he was listening to "closet" by pete yorn, another song that has trying to meet you in the lyrics.
it's kind of like a sign that jesus really wants me to go to new york.
heave ho, chaps.
when you were young, and your heart was an open book,
you used to say live and let live.
in an exclusive interview, the bible caught up with j from F A R, who recently purchased a new car. the transcript follows:
the bible (after devouring twinkie): hi darling! did you get my messages?
j from F A R: (silence)
the bible: i've really enjoyed our talks. by the way,jesus really does want to hook up with you.
j from F A R: (silence)
the bible: hold on, let me finish this chili dog. (pause) dang, processed meat is fantastic.
j from F A R: (silence)
the bible: now, you've said many times before, that if your caloric intake is higher than your physical exertion, you're going to get fat, isn't that correct?
j from F A R: (throws eggs at retarded children)
the bible: i see. are you angry at the world for substantial reasons, or because you know you'll have that stupid brand on your arm for the rest of your life?
j from F A R: (shouting obscenities to handicapped nuns crossing street)
the bible: well, you seem to be all tied up here. i'm gonna go see if the krispy kreme 'hot' light is on. so good to finally meet you.
j from F A R: (beating old person in wheelchair) you too. late.
live and let di-eee-ie.
in an exclusive interview, the bible caught up with j from F A R, who recently purchased a new car. the transcript follows: the bible (after devouring twinkie): hi darling! did you get my messages?
j from F A R: (silence)
the bible: i've really enjoyed our talks. by the way,jesus really does want to hook up with you.
j from F A R: (silence)
the bible: hold on, let me finish this chili dog. (pause) dang, processed meat is fantastic.
j from F A R: (silence)
the bible: now, you've said many times before, that if your caloric intake is higher than your physical exertion, you're going to get fat, isn't that correct?
j from F A R: (throws eggs at retarded children)
the bible: i see. are you angry at the world for substantial reasons, or because you know you'll have that stupid brand on your arm for the rest of your life?
j from F A R: (shouting obscenities to handicapped nuns crossing street)
the bible: well, you seem to be all tied up here. i'm gonna go see if the krispy kreme 'hot' light is on. so good to finally meet you.
j from F A R: (beating old person in wheelchair) you too. late.
live and let di-eee-ie.
posted by gijyun |
2.16.2005
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1:39 PM
they forgot to mention that we're obviously a bunch of slackers.
colorado, while exceptionally scenic and personable, is not known for it's competitive attitude.
hundreds of thousands of tourists flock annually to relax in mountain town resorts and enjoy glorious centennial state summers, probably partaking in local hobbies like microbrewing and other recreational habits during their stay.
but, as a permanent resident of this state, i'm slightly dumbfounded, if not offended.
i don't spend a good 25% of my income to be labeled 'among the worst.' in the words of gordon bombay, it's not worth winning if you can't win big.
i hope those of you in the mile high city and surrounding areas are heeding my advice; perhaps this will up your motivation next year to be number one.
hundreds of thousands of tourists flock annually to relax in mountain town resorts and enjoy glorious centennial state summers, probably partaking in local hobbies like microbrewing and other recreational habits during their stay.
but, as a permanent resident of this state, i'm slightly dumbfounded, if not offended.
i don't spend a good 25% of my income to be labeled 'among the worst.' in the words of gordon bombay, it's not worth winning if you can't win big.
i hope those of you in the mile high city and surrounding areas are heeding my advice; perhaps this will up your motivation next year to be number one.
i didn't say it. i don't owe @#$%.
i'm going to buy pants tonight. i hate shopping for pants. and then, if i'm lucky, i'm getting drunk.
posted by gijyun |
2.15.2005
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3:25 PM
nba all-star weekend = anne hiding under a rock.
no, really - i'm thrilled that p. diddy's renting out the worst club in the entire city.
my god. i can hear the publicity phonecall for that one:
sean combs' publicist: hi, we want to spend a lot of money. do you even accept money in denver, or do you still barter and trade?
denver publicist: hi, i'm a robot. please come visit our lovely city.
sean combs' publicist: yeah, i know...we are...but, we want to spend a lot of money. where can we go to do this?
denver publicist: hi, i'm a robot. we have a number of corporate conglomerate shopping districts from which to chose.
sean combs' publicist: what? no, we're looking for a club. like a dance club. can you recommend any? particularly one that's decorated with plywood?
denver publicist: hi, i'm a robot. why don't you check out the wonderful ocean journey while you're here?
sean combs' publicist: (keeps pressing "0" to speak to an operator)
denver publicist: hi, i'm a robot. have you considered partaking in winter sports during your visit? colorado has many mountain ranges and resorts from which to chose.
sean combs' publicist: yeah, we don't ski. we want to party. where do people party in denver? do you know what party means? alize? vodka? crystal?
denver publicist: hi, i'm a robot. denver is fully equipped to facilitate your corporate event functions. we have a beautiful new convention center, located in the center of our vivacious downtown.
sean combs' publicist: no, this isn't a corporate event.
denver publicist: yes, but i'm still a robot. the luxurious downtown shopping district, Denver Pavillions, has a suitable night club, complete with expensive parking a colorful clientele! should you chose club beyond (and yes, every bar in denver is considered a club as long as you put the word 'club' in front of the name), you guarantee my job security!
sean combs' publicist: okay, we'll go there, then. thanks.
denver publicist: bye! i'm a robot!
fin
my god. i can hear the publicity phonecall for that one:
sean combs' publicist: hi, we want to spend a lot of money. do you even accept money in denver, or do you still barter and trade?
denver publicist: hi, i'm a robot. please come visit our lovely city.
sean combs' publicist: yeah, i know...we are...but, we want to spend a lot of money. where can we go to do this?
denver publicist: hi, i'm a robot. we have a number of corporate conglomerate shopping districts from which to chose.
sean combs' publicist: what? no, we're looking for a club. like a dance club. can you recommend any? particularly one that's decorated with plywood?
denver publicist: hi, i'm a robot. why don't you check out the wonderful ocean journey while you're here?
sean combs' publicist: (keeps pressing "0" to speak to an operator)
denver publicist: hi, i'm a robot. have you considered partaking in winter sports during your visit? colorado has many mountain ranges and resorts from which to chose.
sean combs' publicist: yeah, we don't ski. we want to party. where do people party in denver? do you know what party means? alize? vodka? crystal?
denver publicist: hi, i'm a robot. denver is fully equipped to facilitate your corporate event functions. we have a beautiful new convention center, located in the center of our vivacious downtown.
sean combs' publicist: no, this isn't a corporate event.
denver publicist: yes, but i'm still a robot. the luxurious downtown shopping district, Denver Pavillions, has a suitable night club, complete with expensive parking a colorful clientele! should you chose club beyond (and yes, every bar in denver is considered a club as long as you put the word 'club' in front of the name), you guarantee my job security!
sean combs' publicist: okay, we'll go there, then. thanks.
denver publicist: bye! i'm a robot!
fin
ow.
my foot hurts. can i go to the nurse?
apparently, my left foot is overworked. it's developed a stress fracture. then it got lonely, and decided it thought my left shin, knee, thigh and hip were having too much fun, and now they all hurt too.
then my right hip felt left out. now it hurts, too.
i can't go to the doctor, because she'll just tell me i shouldn't go to new york next week, and then scam me out of $50 for a co-pay.
she'll tell me i should stay off my feet, lie on my back as much as possible.
and then i'd have to look at her and ask her what kind of girl she took me for.
apparently, my left foot is overworked. it's developed a stress fracture. then it got lonely, and decided it thought my left shin, knee, thigh and hip were having too much fun, and now they all hurt too.
then my right hip felt left out. now it hurts, too.
i can't go to the doctor, because she'll just tell me i shouldn't go to new york next week, and then scam me out of $50 for a co-pay.
she'll tell me i should stay off my feet, lie on my back as much as possible.
and then i'd have to look at her and ask her what kind of girl she took me for.
posted by gijyun |
2.14.2005
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2:25 PM
hi.
my name's nikko. i'm pretty rad.my mom thinks it's super funny to dress me up in these obnoxiously festive scarves - then she points at me and laughs and tells are her friends i look 'gay.'
you should have seen what she did for the 2003 college basketball final four: her boyfriend went to university of kansas and she made me wear her stupid terrapins t-shirt for a week.
a week!
i'm hoping you all will help me out; the thing is, we got this scarf as a present. it has hearts on one side and clovers on the other, so i have a feeling i'm doomed to wear it for a healthy month.my mom thinks that's hilarious. she has no concern for my feelings.
and to top it off, she got a new digital camera, and won't stop taking pictures of me. she even took my collar off last night and took photos of me naked. isn't that illegal or something?
anyway, if you get a chance, tell her i look stupid and to take this thing off. i'm going to puke on the couch like i did last week. she'll love that.
luv, nikko
may cupid use his good eye when aiming at you today.
yo.
steve shoppman is looking for a roommate.
if you're relatively financially responsible, want to live right by city park, aren't too annoying and you want to live with one of the coolest guys in the world, let him know.
washer/dryer, private bathroom, plenty of space. here's some more info.
steve's got a sweet house and a cool dog. he enjoys hard work, mountain sports and partying (ladies, steve has hott friends). chickenheads need not apply.
you can email steve directly or you can email me for more personal referrences.
if you're relatively financially responsible, want to live right by city park, aren't too annoying and you want to live with one of the coolest guys in the world, let him know.
washer/dryer, private bathroom, plenty of space. here's some more info.
steve's got a sweet house and a cool dog. he enjoys hard work, mountain sports and partying (ladies, steve has hott friends). chickenheads need not apply.
you can email steve directly or you can email me for more personal referrences.
posted by gijyun |
2.12.2005
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3:13 PM
friday off!
i have my first real friday off since i think october, though work's already called twice since 7 am.
i'm overwhelmed with possibilities of how to effectively use all of this free time. i think i've settled with going back to sleep.
we've upped the ante for the no swearing game - you owe a dollar for every slip-up. i'm already at about $11, and page, bless her, is around $27.
the guidelines fall around the 'nothing a 10 year old wouldn't say' category, so the real challenge for me is not saying 'gay' all the time. feel free to leave suggestions for words i can use that are as phonetically pleasing as 'gay,' because i'm dying without it.
2 days down, 38 to go. kind of like when i gave up drinking for a month.
my best good friend steve's birthday and subsequent party are on saturday. woooo.
have a g-a-y weekend.
i'm overwhelmed with possibilities of how to effectively use all of this free time. i think i've settled with going back to sleep.
we've upped the ante for the no swearing game - you owe a dollar for every slip-up. i'm already at about $11, and page, bless her, is around $27.
the guidelines fall around the 'nothing a 10 year old wouldn't say' category, so the real challenge for me is not saying 'gay' all the time. feel free to leave suggestions for words i can use that are as phonetically pleasing as 'gay,' because i'm dying without it.
2 days down, 38 to go. kind of like when i gave up drinking for a month.
my best good friend steve's birthday and subsequent party are on saturday. woooo.
have a g-a-y weekend.
posted by gijyun |
2.11.2005
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9:05 AM
thursday, february 10, 2005
i write the best headlines...ever.
i'm giving up curse words for lent.
it was either that or my other vice, and we all know that's not going anywhere.
if you weren't at bender's last night, you missed page, page's stupid 80's mesh shirt, brianna's boyfriend mike making fun of page's stupid 80's mesh shirt, and, most importantly, brianna's boyfriend wearing page's stupid 80's mesh shirt on the dancefloor.
which brings me to one of the reasons we've all gathered here today.
my camera, which, and i think you'll agree, needs replacing, so i'd like to point you all in the direction of my paypal account. just give me a few bucks. do it for posterity (or give it to charity. i don't really care).
yes, i know. this is the gayest post in the history of computers.
in closing, i'd like to leave you with some (original, unedited) words i received via email this morning, raising the bar in the category of best @#$%ing email ever sent by a stranger:
from: david
sent: thursday, february 10, 2005 11:15 am
to: gijyun
subject: my little gideeon's bible
i would like to thank you for presenting me with a bible in 1976 when i was 14 years old.
my faith has had its ups and downs but whenever i need guidance i can always rely on my little bible. i have owned and disposed of many bibles and other books when i thought i didn`t need them anymore but i couldn1t get rid of my little red bible bacause i felt it would be wrong and that i would be needing it again one day. and here i am again needing my gideons bibble again.
ifeel i1ve reached some sort of maturity in my fath now and am thinking fo getting back to my christian life
to who ever issued bibles in paisley scotland to students at camphill high school in october 1976 thank you god was truly with you on that day
...i regretted to inform david that sadly, i had not been born on the glorious day of which he praised, but i thanked him anyway and invited him to send me fistfuls of cash.
six months, two weeks and four days til my birthday, just so you know.
lounge is on tonight at the high street speakeasy.
i'm giving up curse words for lent.
it was either that or my other vice, and we all know that's not going anywhere.
if you weren't at bender's last night, you missed page, page's stupid 80's mesh shirt, brianna's boyfriend mike making fun of page's stupid 80's mesh shirt, and, most importantly, brianna's boyfriend wearing page's stupid 80's mesh shirt on the dancefloor.
which brings me to one of the reasons we've all gathered here today.
my camera, which, and i think you'll agree, needs replacing, so i'd like to point you all in the direction of my paypal account. just give me a few bucks. do it for posterity (or give it to charity. i don't really care).
yes, i know. this is the gayest post in the history of computers.
in closing, i'd like to leave you with some (original, unedited) words i received via email this morning, raising the bar in the category of best @#$%ing email ever sent by a stranger:
from: david
sent: thursday, february 10, 2005 11:15 am
to: gijyun
subject: my little gideeon's bible
i would like to thank you for presenting me with a bible in 1976 when i was 14 years old.
my faith has had its ups and downs but whenever i need guidance i can always rely on my little bible. i have owned and disposed of many bibles and other books when i thought i didn`t need them anymore but i couldn1t get rid of my little red bible bacause i felt it would be wrong and that i would be needing it again one day. and here i am again needing my gideons bibble again.
ifeel i1ve reached some sort of maturity in my fath now and am thinking fo getting back to my christian life
to who ever issued bibles in paisley scotland to students at camphill high school in october 1976 thank you god was truly with you on that day
...i regretted to inform david that sadly, i had not been born on the glorious day of which he praised, but i thanked him anyway and invited him to send me fistfuls of cash.
six months, two weeks and four days til my birthday, just so you know.
lounge is on tonight at the high street speakeasy.
posted by gijyun |
2.10.2005
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9:27 AM
shake your piggy banks, kiddos.
here's an update for stuff you should probably know about so you sound relatively cool and informed like me.
2/9 - tonight! interpol afterparty w/ carlos d @ benders
2/11 - matson jones, bright channel @ climax lounge
2/11 - secrect machines (with moving units & autolux!) @ fox theater
2/19 - low @ the bluebird
2/20 - june @ climax lounge
2/25 - drop the fear @ the hi-dive
2/28 - hot hot heat @ the fox
3/3 - modest mouse @ the fillmore
3/4 - the walkmen @ the bluebird
3/14 - kings of convenience @ fox theater
3/19 - elis costello & the imposters @ the fillmore
4/15,16 - drive by truckers @ fox theater
4/22 - fiery furnaces @ fox theater
5/3 - the killers @ the paramount (wtf?)
2/9 - tonight! interpol afterparty w/ carlos d @ benders
2/11 - matson jones, bright channel @ climax lounge
2/11 - secrect machines (with moving units & autolux!) @ fox theater
2/19 - low @ the bluebird
2/20 - june @ climax lounge
2/25 - drop the fear @ the hi-dive
2/28 - hot hot heat @ the fox
3/3 - modest mouse @ the fillmore
3/4 - the walkmen @ the bluebird
3/14 - kings of convenience @ fox theater
3/19 - elis costello & the imposters @ the fillmore
4/15,16 - drive by truckers @ fox theater
4/22 - fiery furnaces @ fox theater
5/3 - the killers @ the paramount (wtf?)
posted by gijyun |
2.09.2005
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1:24 PM
senor mccormack's adventures in chinese medicine
which one of you bastards blocked my chi? fess up. it's making my leg hurt.
i've had a searing pain from my hip to the bottom of my left foot (perhaps its all those paintings, no?) for the last five days, like the kind of pain that's not funny because it makes me limp like a
after a complimentary meal at a fancy new spanish/irish bistro (that included two free drinks and a live performance of the theme song to 'doogie howser, m.d.') just outside of the southmoore park area last night, i went to get needles poked into my skin. my friend laura is a student of chinese medicine, and said she would do me the honor of breaking my acupuncture cherry.
"have you tried cupping?" she asked, with the twinkle in her eye, similar to what you see when someone offers you ecstasy for the first time.
no, does it hurt?
it doesn't hurt. it's great. grand. wonderful. even though my leg still hurts a little (something we both decided orthopedic inserts would probably cover), my chronic back pain feels so much better. i can even turn around and look behind me now.
i didn't come close to getting the round, purple hickeys on my back (which i thought was the coolest part...you know, to show to little kids and make them cry) to show off that gwenyth paltrow does, but it was a successful dive anyway.
more later. i almost walked out of my job yesterday. it was awesome. you should try it.
mid-monday traffic.
since everyone knows jon and marcello not only suck ass but are probably the two most boring people on earth, i wanted to dish up some juicy bits from last weekend and the upcoming week.
here you go.
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friday night - you KNOW when someone you haven't seen in, what, seven years, sees you at a bar, won't give you any details about her sister (one of your best friends from high school), and says, "how have you been, do you have a blog?" out of the blue, that something's totally up.
whatever. i gave her the link anyway.
_________________________________
michael trundle, one of the dj's at lipgloss and purveyor of rebellious jukebox, has managed once again to make carlos D of interpol (at the fillmore wednesday night) rock denver's shit with an after-party at bender's on 13th. get there. good work, fellas.
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is it mardi gras week or something? was the superbowl yesterday or something? and what's this shit i hear about an nba all star weekend?
_________________________________
i'm getting very excited for my 5-day trip to new york city. i've never been to the MoMA, but i want to go and look at rothkos.
you can read adventures of my gracious nyc hostess and her husband here and here, respectively.
_________________________________
thursday is the lounge meeting at the speakeasy, but, as usual, i'll post updates later in the week.
here you go.
friday night - you KNOW when someone you haven't seen in, what, seven years, sees you at a bar, won't give you any details about her sister (one of your best friends from high school), and says, "how have you been, do you have a blog?" out of the blue, that something's totally up.
whatever. i gave her the link anyway.
michael trundle, one of the dj's at lipgloss and purveyor of rebellious jukebox, has managed once again to make carlos D of interpol (at the fillmore wednesday night) rock denver's shit with an after-party at bender's on 13th. get there. good work, fellas.
is it mardi gras week or something? was the superbowl yesterday or something? and what's this shit i hear about an nba all star weekend?
i'm getting very excited for my 5-day trip to new york city. i've never been to the MoMA, but i want to go and look at rothkos.
you can read adventures of my gracious nyc hostess and her husband here and here, respectively.
thursday is the lounge meeting at the speakeasy, but, as usual, i'll post updates later in the week.
posted by gijyun |
2.07.2005
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1:47 PM
expatriates find jobs, lives
two ex-denver residents who decided last fall that the reasonable property values, vibrant night life, continuous sunshine and the collectively cordial attitude of the mile high city were no longer desirable released statements this weekend concerning their where-abouts and well-being.
marcello de feo, busker artist and wannabe wordsmith, has secured a position in downtown philadelphia (about a 45 minute commute from his current place of residence) "feeding [his] cat, checking [his] email."
when asked for a description of his job containing a little less sarcasm, de feo, long time ass clown, replied, "that's what i'm talking about."
de feo's fiance carrie is reportedly employed and doing well, and the two have closed on a home.
de feo stated, "it's more than we wanted to pay, but this position i got feeding the cat and checking email is paying like, twice what i was making at the edgewater."
that information being given, our records show de feo's current calculated salary as $10K/annum.
de feo's exroommate and longtime lover, jon gibbons, also checked in this weekend after having secured an employment position of his own.
(via instant message) "yeah, as soon as i pass this piss test, i'm golden," gibbons stated, who was reportedly worried about the status of the outcome.
when contacted for further comment (via instant message), gibbons had this to say about his excitement for his new position: "i'm not jon. i'm his mom. jon's not here."
interested parties can follow the ongoing de feo/thurber wedding coordination here, and jon gibbons has returned to composing half-assed posts for his newly-themed sports blog.
friday potpourri!
i have a cold. i'm about to go cough on my superior so she gets mad and sends me home.
in that light, i think we should get the fuck off the boulder hate-train and onto the "let's fuck up lyrics to pop songs" train, because that's about all my brain can handle right now.
i'll start with some easy ones, and then we'll discuss them, and then you kids can have at it because mommy's tired. here we go.
let's talk about wrecks, bay-bee.
let's talk about jews and geese.
let's talk about all the hoodlings and the bat wings that may be.
let's talk abowwwt wrecks.
see how i play this game? just take a song and replace the non-proper nouns with words that ryhme, occasionally inserting a culturally sensitive term, just to make sure people are on their toes.
it's easy. let's do another.
your phone. personal. fetus.
someone to peel your hairs.
someone who stares.
rhyming with 'jesus' is hard, no? but i think you're catching on. let's do one more, sticking with the 90's hits.
oh girl i'm drinkin' dubya.
i'm always shrinking up cuz
i flaunt you to go i blew it all for druuugs.
that's all i got, but give it a go. the person with the best lyrics will get a personal, customized photo of my shoe that i'll take with my cameraphone.
on a quick sidenote, i'm considering entering the medical field; i've done some serious health study research this past week, and i've made an observation that if you have a cold, the best road back to health is not with alcohol and cigarettes. i believe i've discovered a serious jumping-off point.
have a great weekend.
in that light, i think we should get the fuck off the boulder hate-train and onto the "let's fuck up lyrics to pop songs" train, because that's about all my brain can handle right now.
i'll start with some easy ones, and then we'll discuss them, and then you kids can have at it because mommy's tired. here we go.
let's talk about wrecks, bay-bee.
let's talk about jews and geese.
let's talk about all the hoodlings and the bat wings that may be.
let's talk abowwwt wrecks.
see how i play this game? just take a song and replace the non-proper nouns with words that ryhme, occasionally inserting a culturally sensitive term, just to make sure people are on their toes.
it's easy. let's do another.
your phone. personal. fetus.
someone to peel your hairs.
someone who stares.
rhyming with 'jesus' is hard, no? but i think you're catching on. let's do one more, sticking with the 90's hits.
oh girl i'm drinkin' dubya.
i'm always shrinking up cuz
i flaunt you to go i blew it all for druuugs.
that's all i got, but give it a go. the person with the best lyrics will get a personal, customized photo of my shoe that i'll take with my cameraphone.
on a quick sidenote, i'm considering entering the medical field; i've done some serious health study research this past week, and i've made an observation that if you have a cold, the best road back to health is not with alcohol and cigarettes. i believe i've discovered a serious jumping-off point.
have a great weekend.
posted by gijyun |
2.04.2005
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8:46 AM
jesus h. christ, you guys.
after emails, comments, and a phonecall from my ian90210 brother this is the last of it. boulder will never be mentioned here again after this, i swear:
do i think churchill should be fired? no.
do i really want boulder and all of its residents, tax-paying or no, to be geographically displaced? no.
do i really think the town is spawn of evil, and i spend my time rallying troops to stand at the I-25/36 exit and point westword and shout wicked curses? no.
i'm glad i have family members, sensitive as they may be, that love that town. i am. in some misconstrewed black hole in my heart, i love it too (because its not college park, maryland, mostly).
if i had a dollar for everytime someone said something i like is stupid, worthless, misunderstood, overrated...i think you know where i'm going.
seriously, just imagine the monstrosity if everyone loved boulder as much as you did. everyone would live there, and the whole town would be trashed.
i can't tell you when to be offended.
but ya'lls time might be better-spent on buying a new, organic, free-range sense of humor.
go buffs!
do i think churchill should be fired? no.
do i really want boulder and all of its residents, tax-paying or no, to be geographically displaced? no.
do i really think the town is spawn of evil, and i spend my time rallying troops to stand at the I-25/36 exit and point westword and shout wicked curses? no.
i'm glad i have family members, sensitive as they may be, that love that town. i am. in some misconstrewed black hole in my heart, i love it too (because its not college park, maryland, mostly).
if i had a dollar for everytime someone said something i like is stupid, worthless, misunderstood, overrated...i think you know where i'm going.
seriously, just imagine the monstrosity if everyone loved boulder as much as you did. everyone would live there, and the whole town would be trashed.
i can't tell you when to be offended.
but ya'lls time might be better-spent on buying a new, organic, free-range sense of humor.
go buffs!
posted by gijyun |
2.03.2005
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11:34 AM
state of the dress union
i know someone's probably bursting at the seams with feedback from last night's state of the union address, but wouldn't you guys rather hear my thoughts on project runway and a rock show instead?
i thought so. the bible strives to be your key resource for all things cultural, intelligent, and containing an alcohol content of +4%.
project runway
kevin was prematurely eja...eliminated. wendy's too focused on winning and not enough on design - her 2055 piece sucked ass and she should've been sent packing. austin is only 23 years old, and kara saun is near 40? i wouldn't've guess her a day over 28. jay's a doll.
everyone knows the competition is between austin and kara saun, but austin's messed up a few times and jay's on the up and up, though i think kara saun's got it in the bag - and good for her.
i give this show two thimbled thumbs up.
starlight mints
it's been a while since i've seen a fun use of multi-media images. they have videos of themselves dancing playing on themselves while they sing, if that makes any sense.
good show. glad i went.
i ran into tammy from dressy bessy who i always feel inclined to say hello to since i wrote my first big girl article on them, and she always humors me.
unlike a strange semi-bearded man who showed up when the set was damn near over, demanding beer and attention, claiming that 'he locked his keys in a cage and got them out with a hanger,' and then got half of his staff drunk on tequila.
pshaw. i've heard a lot of sorry excuses in my day, but that's a pretty good one. next time, be sure to offer the nice policeman one of your crispy tacos to avoid confrontation.
i hope that i've given you enough substance to distract you from the bru-ha-ha of the state of the union address - everyone knows politics are fake, anyway. when in doubt, it's best to seek refuge in reality shows for fashion designers and shots of jagermeister.
amen.
i thought so. the bible strives to be your key resource for all things cultural, intelligent, and containing an alcohol content of +4%.
project runway
kevin was prematurely eja...eliminated. wendy's too focused on winning and not enough on design - her 2055 piece sucked ass and she should've been sent packing. austin is only 23 years old, and kara saun is near 40? i wouldn't've guess her a day over 28. jay's a doll.
everyone knows the competition is between austin and kara saun, but austin's messed up a few times and jay's on the up and up, though i think kara saun's got it in the bag - and good for her.
i give this show two thimbled thumbs up.
starlight mints
it's been a while since i've seen a fun use of multi-media images. they have videos of themselves dancing playing on themselves while they sing, if that makes any sense.
good show. glad i went.
i ran into tammy from dressy bessy who i always feel inclined to say hello to since i wrote my first big girl article on them, and she always humors me.
unlike a strange semi-bearded man who showed up when the set was damn near over, demanding beer and attention, claiming that 'he locked his keys in a cage and got them out with a hanger,' and then got half of his staff drunk on tequila.
pshaw. i've heard a lot of sorry excuses in my day, but that's a pretty good one. next time, be sure to offer the nice policeman one of your crispy tacos to avoid confrontation.
i hope that i've given you enough substance to distract you from the bru-ha-ha of the state of the union address - everyone knows politics are fake, anyway. when in doubt, it's best to seek refuge in reality shows for fashion designers and shots of jagermeister.
amen.
starlight mints
the starlight mints are playing at larimer lounge tonight, circa 8 p.m.ish. the show's only $8.
lemme know if you're going.
lemme know if you're going.
posted by gijyun |
2.02.2005
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3:40 PM
mothers, don't let your children grow their hair long.
if you're not dead (and, lets face it, i hope you're not because you probably owe me money), you've probably caught wind of yet another spectacular boulder spectacle this week.
parents and students alike are in arms about ethics professor ward churchill's comments regarding victims of 9/11 as he compared them to nazi officials.
smooth, dawg. if i were you, i'd wear my sunglasses for my faculty headshot, too.
he's stepped down as chair of the department of ethics studies, and taxpayers announced their fury as the professor's tenure is protecting his position at the boulder campus university.
there's so many things going on here i don't know where to start.
...yes i do.
a little girl named jon benet.
riots. couch burning.
sexual harassment scandals.
boulder, your ass is lucky all that kobe bryant shit happened out in bumblefuck, because otherwise i'd be writing to state legislators to have your ass permanently removed from the map.
fox theater, you can stay (you too, boulder theater, and i guess trilogy lounge, too, as long as i'm dishing it out), but as for the rest of that god-forsaken town, i quoth myself when i say there's always "reasons i don't fucking live in boulder."
before you flood my email or comments either supporting or condemning professor churchill, know this: while i find his comments repulsive, i cannot hold him responsible for what he's done. he's the pantymouthed product of the bubble of deathgrip groupthink that is that stinking town.
i'm all for free speech - if you didn't notice, i just told a whole town to go eff itself - but when i myself was a university of colorado (at denver) student, there's rhetoric behind the fact that every semester i was at school, there was a petition to remove ourselves from associations with the university of colorado at boulder, acquire a new mascot, and carry on with our lives.
boulder, seriously, we're done with you.
msn's highly anticipated albums of 2005 (dvd bonus edition!)
you figure a company that's worth nearly as much as our national debt can hire net writers that live up to their salaries.
let's put them to the test.
Heating Up 2005: Top Albums to Watch for.
William Friar, Special to MSN Music.
1. 50 cent - st. valentine's day massacre due: march 8
okay, sure. but couldn't his million-dollar marketing department realize the selling power of releasing it on valentine's day? that's only three weeks in front of the set release date. and yes, when it comes to that department i'm always for hire.
2. jennifer lopez - rebirth due: march 1
blogga who? anyone who goes on inside the actors studio and tells jimmy lipton that they were going to name the album call me jennifer, and then makes a public statement that people are allowed to call her jen, j.lo, or jennifer and then makes a video for her title track that stars no one but herself might be a little too stuck in 'me' world - not the wisest career move when the entire world was purged after overdosing on paparrazzi photos of your many husbands, your ass, and your stupid perfume.
back to the bronx with you.
3. dr. dre - detox release: fall 2005
as an album that's hyped as "the most musically advanced hip-hop album ever," i don't care to see any videos unless, in which, 40's are repeatedly taken from a stocked fridge and dumped on an innocent female bystander.
things can change, dre, but some things have to stay the same.
4. kate bush - ? release: ?
OMFG @!#$dfPODF QW;OE9sldk 0934r 1R@#$ dsvjkcxv!!!! lawdy, i done shat myself. it only took her 12 years to finish runnin' up that hill, but i'll be at the record store with a jackson in hand the day this woman's work comes out (i know, i'm gay). dude, even andre 3000 digs kate bush.
5. beck - guero release: ?
people who talk shit about beck forget about a little track known as mountain dew rock. i don't care who you are - in 1994, at some point in time, you KNOW you walked around shouting "soy un predador!"
beck, though poppy and broad, can still be considered progressive. so all the hipsters that bashed the shit out of him at coachella last year should've been taking notes instead: maybe boring is the new white belt - and i bet a year from now, you'll be bragging about how long you've been boring, and how you were boring before anyone else was boring.
yo...cut it.
6. system of a down - mesmerize/hypnotize release: ?
we're out of my genre here.
but that's not to say back in very early 2000 when they performed on conan o'brien, and the boy i was dating stomped out of the room because i couldn't stop laughing because the lead singer had drawn tears on his face with eyeliner that i didn't update my standards of the other sex to include "must not like system of a down."
but i'm open to negotiations. especially for money.
7. audioslave - ? release: ?
you shouldn't bother debating whether or not audioslave's second album will sell millions and take over the world, especially since it's produced by rick rubin.
i'll agree with my msn cohort here and say that rubin's challenge is not to push records - audioslave could sell itself - but to not let this new album become so oversaturated that the streets are lined with audioslave puke less than six months after its release.
8. coldplay - ? release: march
while i agree with some that that whole nappies thing was downright retarded, you have to give chris martin some credit for being willing to destroy his worldwide street cred to make sure his wife and unborn baby knew they were loved.
and for being fucking hot. oh, and for a sophomore album that didn't suck.
seriously, i think coldplay makes truly pretty, pensive music, and if that's a crime, i'll be glad to punish them severely. a rush of blood to the head, including one of the title tracks, aptly named a rush of blood to the head are quality in my book, especially when played on repeat in your office so that your coworker asks you to wear headphones.
and while i make fun of celebrity activists and philanthropists (i'm looking at you, bono! you geriatric has-been!), i actually think its reassuring to know that even rich people shoot their mouth off about crap they don't know about.
much like i've just done here.
(dear bono - i'm sorry. you're not a has-been, but please, invest in a new style of sunglasses.)
so, to sum up, i guess net writers at msn.com aren't all that bad, and yes, i'm available for hire.
let's put them to the test.
William Friar, Special to MSN Music.
1. 50 cent - st. valentine's day massacre due: march 8
okay, sure. but couldn't his million-dollar marketing department realize the selling power of releasing it on valentine's day? that's only three weeks in front of the set release date. and yes, when it comes to that department i'm always for hire.
2. jennifer lopez - rebirth due: march 1
blogga who? anyone who goes on inside the actors studio and tells jimmy lipton that they were going to name the album call me jennifer, and then makes a public statement that people are allowed to call her jen, j.lo, or jennifer and then makes a video for her title track that stars no one but herself might be a little too stuck in 'me' world - not the wisest career move when the entire world was purged after overdosing on paparrazzi photos of your many husbands, your ass, and your stupid perfume.
back to the bronx with you.
3. dr. dre - detox release: fall 2005
as an album that's hyped as "the most musically advanced hip-hop album ever," i don't care to see any videos unless, in which, 40's are repeatedly taken from a stocked fridge and dumped on an innocent female bystander.
things can change, dre, but some things have to stay the same.
4. kate bush - ? release: ?
OMFG @!#$dfPODF QW;OE9sldk 0934r 1R@#$ dsvjkcxv!!!! lawdy, i done shat myself. it only took her 12 years to finish runnin' up that hill, but i'll be at the record store with a jackson in hand the day this woman's work comes out (i know, i'm gay). dude, even andre 3000 digs kate bush.
5. beck - guero release: ?
people who talk shit about beck forget about a little track known as mountain dew rock. i don't care who you are - in 1994, at some point in time, you KNOW you walked around shouting "soy un predador!"
beck, though poppy and broad, can still be considered progressive. so all the hipsters that bashed the shit out of him at coachella last year should've been taking notes instead: maybe boring is the new white belt - and i bet a year from now, you'll be bragging about how long you've been boring, and how you were boring before anyone else was boring.
yo...cut it.
6. system of a down - mesmerize/hypnotize release: ?
we're out of my genre here.
but that's not to say back in very early 2000 when they performed on conan o'brien, and the boy i was dating stomped out of the room because i couldn't stop laughing because the lead singer had drawn tears on his face with eyeliner that i didn't update my standards of the other sex to include "must not like system of a down."
but i'm open to negotiations. especially for money.
7. audioslave - ? release: ?
you shouldn't bother debating whether or not audioslave's second album will sell millions and take over the world, especially since it's produced by rick rubin.
i'll agree with my msn cohort here and say that rubin's challenge is not to push records - audioslave could sell itself - but to not let this new album become so oversaturated that the streets are lined with audioslave puke less than six months after its release.
8. coldplay - ? release: march
while i agree with some that that whole nappies thing was downright retarded, you have to give chris martin some credit for being willing to destroy his worldwide street cred to make sure his wife and unborn baby knew they were loved.
and for being fucking hot. oh, and for a sophomore album that didn't suck.
seriously, i think coldplay makes truly pretty, pensive music, and if that's a crime, i'll be glad to punish them severely. a rush of blood to the head, including one of the title tracks, aptly named a rush of blood to the head are quality in my book, especially when played on repeat in your office so that your coworker asks you to wear headphones.
and while i make fun of celebrity activists and philanthropists (i'm looking at you, bono! you geriatric has-been!), i actually think its reassuring to know that even rich people shoot their mouth off about crap they don't know about.
much like i've just done here.
(dear bono - i'm sorry. you're not a has-been, but please, invest in a new style of sunglasses.)
so, to sum up, i guess net writers at msn.com aren't all that bad, and yes, i'm available for hire.
posted by gijyun |
2.01.2005
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10:01 AM
...i wonder if it'll be an all-ages event.
